DS1 and DS2 are trained for over a year now but DS2 has been having some accidents. He had a few in montessori just after he started but I put that down to the change etc.
Over the past few weeks this has started to happen again.
He's done it once or twice at his minder's, once in school and a few times here.
Yesterday though it got worse. He soiled himself twice and then wet himself - all in the space of about 3 hours. The wee was the worst. He was standing up on the back of his toy forklift and just stood there while the wee dribbled down him all over the toy and onto the floor
I'm afraid to give out as I don't want him to feel punished. I've had a little chat each time askign him how it happened and telling him to make sure to get to the loo in time next time etc. He's not put out a bit by it. He was standing by the bath yesterday, naked from the waist down, legs poo-ridden (sorry if TMI
) and he was boogeying and singing while I went for the wipes (gave him a good bath then last night to really clean him
)
I hope it's not to get attention. He lay in bed with me yesterday morning for an hour for "cuddles" and we baked cakes yesterday, himself and DS1 breaking the eggs etc...
Any ideas?
Answers:
Holly,
I have heard that sometimes accidents can re occur if they get a UTI, has he been off form in any other way recently? Maybe drop a sample into the GP to get tested just in case as they can be very silent.
Other than that I have no other ideas, hope you get to the bottom of it soon,
T
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Holly,
was it DS2 that had the problems with constipation. If so you are probably right to approach carefully, you don't want him trying to hold it in too long either and causing problems that way.
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HI Ticka - he seems to be in ok form. I'll keep an eye out and might bring a sample in a day or so if that's the case. Thanks for that.
Claire - yes he had the constipation problems and still does sporadically. We actually ended up in A&E earlier this year with it so that's why I'm adopting the softly, softly approach.
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holly,
one of the boys had a regression like this, but only wees.
we could not figure it out and had him with the doc, but all was ok.
thn it dawned on me, my sis had had a baby, and i was very involved in helping out, and it was pure regression.
i popped him back in pullups and (might sound mean i know) restricted the big boy activities he could do.
not in a punishing way, just in a matter of fact way.
i never punished him for it or gave out, just took a very calm approach.
it had righted itself in about a week.
i dont know if you have had anoy other changes other than the baby being born?
havn't you recently gone back to work?
could it be that if he is a "baby" again mummy will stay home?
small kids really do think in black and white like this, and sometimes we overlook the obvious.
i'd still have his urine tested, just to make sure it's not a uti.
Answers:
Or could your DS have suddenly got a fear of the bathroom/toilet - my DD went through a phase of not wanting to go to the toilet (involved a few wetting incidents) unless I went to the bathroom with her, especially when it was dark and involved switching on a light - she had gotten it into her head that a witch was living in the toilet !
Maddy
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Holly,
My dd is 3 1/2 and still has 'accidents', only they're not accidents really - its quite deliberate. She doesn't care if she soils herself, and wouldn't care if I put her back in nappies. She has problems with constipation on and off, so I don't want to make an issue of it in case she starts holding it.
I really don't know how to tackle it either - this is going on since she trained last May.
SIL told me that her little guy (DDs cousin) was at the same lark till he was 5 - he just didn't care.
Not much help, but you're not alone.
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hi Holly,
It could be linked to his constipation. Sometimes constipation can affect the muscles of the bladder/bowel and block the signals to the brain (not sure if I am explaining this very well). Anyway it can cause accidents as they really don't know they need to go, and it can also cause poo accidents (which can be very loose, tmi I know).
Anyway it might be worth taking him along to the doctor and getting a urine sample checked. Also he can tell you if he is still constipated (just because you poo every day does not mean you are not constipated, it may not be emptying properly). If he is, sorting that out might help.
Also you may have to start retraining his bladder/bowel, by bringing him to the toilet frequently and making him finish properly, like you would have done originally,
hth, L
Answers:
Lots to take on board ladies - thanks
gerts - no major changes really. I went back to work in September so it's a while ago now and he would still go to the minders on and off in the summer. As I'm typing this, I'm realising that my Dad has been in hospital for a knee replacement and had some complications after it so I've been away a few nights (4 in a fortnight). Maybe that's it?? He's a sensitive little soul too and comes after me if I'm going away in the mornings saying "Mammy, can I tell you something? You're my friend." Sometimes he does it so often it'd drive you distraction - especially when you're late.
He did ask a few times lately in the mornign too "Mammy - when are you coming back?" as a few times I went to Dublin to see Dad and stayed over..............
Maddy - we have had the odd slip where he goes to the toilet, the light isn't on and he comes running back for us to go an dput the light out. In the meantime he has an accident.
These times lately though he hasn't even made an effort to go to the bathroom.
new lad - thanks for that. At least I know I'm not alone.
lumpy - the constipation link makes sense too.
THanks again - lots to think about. We had an accident-free day today so I'll see what happens in the next few days.
x
Answers:
Nothing more to add to what the others have said Holly just that as you are rightly taking the softly softly approach, on days like today when he has had no accidents - give him lots of attention maybe so it is the opposite of days when he has accidents, matter of fact attention but still letting him know that it makes you happy when he uses the toilet all the time, good luck with it
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Thanks Paula. Good idea.
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Was with the Doctor Monday for T and myself and mentioned this problem. Doc thinks it's constipation-related and I've to keep him on duphalac to clear him completely to make sure there's no blockage there.
Did it again last night, poor fella.
Thanks
Answers:
Going through a total regression at the moment too. DS1 always had a bit of a problem with the wees but since day one of training never had a poo accident. When DS2 was born in March he started doing wees in his pants all the time and then in October when I went back to work part time everything went haywire, poos sometimes 2 or 3 times a day… and not a bother on him about it. So he’s back in pull ups the last few weeks and we’re going to just give him a break till Christmas and then see about saying Santy will take his pull ups with him… but I really thought we had this sussed and it feels like we’re back to square one… also had his urine tested too just in case but it seems like a simple regression case ..
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Very frustrating isn't it roopy?
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Totally Holly.. kind of feeling guilty and worried and wondering where we went wrong a bit. But I mentioned it to the PHN and she said they see it a lot with new babies arriving, particularly if big brother (or sister) is a sensitive soul which DS1 definitely is. PHN suggested that DS1 needs some ‘man’ time with Daddy… football and monster trucks and building with tools and such like … so we’re giving that a try too before we take the plunge back into big boy pants after Christmas
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so is DS2 - most definitely.
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