I'm very bossy and always have been but now my son is at it too!!
Mammy no sit there. Daddy no open that. Mammy give me this. Daddy put that there.....ad nauseum.
I'm at a loss at how best to tackle it - is it best ignored, or should we gently re-route the converstation, or what?
I would expect a Please or Thank you at least. But it's a cute stage, isn't it? It's so funny to hear the bossiness from someone just getting the hang of speech.
Okay - honest opinion and I'm only going by what you say... But if (as you say) you are bossy and if you talk how your son is now talking - then I'd start if you can by adapting your own behaviour then try steering him towards a more gentle and polite way of asking/acting etc.
I feel what I've written above may come across as rude and genuinely I'm not trying to be - but I guess if you feel his manner is a little impolite then it's worth giving some thought to your own if you do feel he is mimicking you? If you're not like that at all I apologies entirely and instead I'd gently prompt him for the more polite 'please' and 'thank you' sort of things by just saying them at the end of his sentences for example.
I often finish by DS's sentences with a please and he normally repeats it after me - not ideal but we're getting there
DD1 was very like this. Tbh we didn't really have a plan to deal with it we just corrected her when we thought of it, At home we made her use the magic word etc. Playschool was great, they rectified a lot of the behaviour through their play and chats etc. In both JI and SI parent teacher evenings both teachers mentioned her 'natural independence not always used democratically' Both years the teachers asked us not to deal with it head on but let them cope with it in the school situation as they felt properly managed could turn into a positive trait.
Unless it manifests itself negatively, eg pushing, bullying etc I wouldn't worry overly
He is great with the please and thank oooo's alright Quadrille but it's more the bossiness about telling me and DH what to do that has me a bit flummoxed. Tis a bit cute but he's getting into stuff like 'Mammy no put that in the bin' 'Mammy no sit there' 'Daddy no go out' that kind of thing!
You're right Rambles he is holding up a very large mirror to my way of behaving. I think I boss DH about re. housework kind of things. I'd say stuff like 'no xxx don't put the saucepan there, I'll soak it before washing it' or 'no don't stick a wash on yet I've to add things to it later'...so I think this is where DS is really picking up on logistics-bossiness . You did not come across as rude at all! - I am not perfect and I do think I'm bossy so I'm upfront about it.
CeeBee you might be right that interaction with others will help. He goes to creche 2 mornings a week and they think he's great - never been mention of bossiness there - the only thing that ever happened was he went through a phase of pushing some of the children over but that lasted 2 wks max and then he stopped and that was 5 months ago. I was just thinking today he'd make a great manager
Think I'm just going to modify my bossines and gently re-route the bossy requests that are not to do with him like DH/me doing things.
It does sound quite cute though lol! My DS has started using slang I use - which is just awful and I'd almost swear that I don't really use slang - until I hear it back and know it could only come from me! DH has different accent as do most people around us - so it's me
My dd went through this too between 2 and 3 and I'm not bossy at all(dp might disagree ) so we had no idea where it came from. We just kind of let it go but if I had the time over again I wouldn't have because it ended up as a control issue. She got too bossy and it was hard to turn her around, there was lots of tears. It is cute but it can get worse as did in my case and got to the stage where she wanted to make all the rules and I had to fight to get control back but could just be a stage too
I would insist on please & thank you & general manners with him.
Thanks Italianfoodie hopefully it is just a phase!
No Emms that's not the issue - he is very well mannered when asking for food, or a book or to be picked up etc and always says Thank OOOoo.
The issue is he's bossing me and DH around about things that shouldn't concern him! - for example Daddy no sit there, Mammy no eat bread, Daddy no put on my boots, Mammy no read book, Mammy no hug Daddy, Mammy no open door - do you know what I mean? I really don't want to be saying 'Mammy no eat bread, please' DS!! I just don't know whether to gently shush him with the bossiness or distract him or is there some other thing that might help - not manners, just bossy.